The Mother Side Blog

The Mother Side / The Mother Side Blog

As I think about writing this I have an old familiar feeling of building anxiety. My heart is racing, I’m clenching my jaw and feeling abnormally hot.  The idea of reliving what was the worst experience of my life brings back those old feelings I would rather forget. It was only a matter of months ago that this was how I felt very second of every day, and thinking about it again sends panic through my veins. Fear that I may feel like this once again if I allow myself...

I woke up this morning with a pounding headache which I don't doubt was linked to the emotional roller-coaster I experienced last night while watching a film at the cinema called Tigers.  The film is based on the true story of the unethical marketing of infant formula by Nestle, one of the largest formula companies in the world, and the devastating consequences for mothers and babies in Pakistan. After the film there was a live Q&A with Andy Paterson, the producer of the film; Syed Aamir Raza Hussain, the former Nestle employee and whistle-blower who exposed them,...

Today I'm pondering the highs and lows of our family sleep journey over the past years. Last night my 8yr old actually sent me away from his bed!! This is the boy who challenged everything about what I thought baby sleep should look like.  The boy who night woke and that I worked tirelessly to get into his own sleep space during the first months of his life.  In the end we co-slept consistently from around 10months, then aged 2-3 we did partial night time co sleeping until he was 5yrs old (he would go...

"Stress is the space between where we are, and where we think we should be" I heard this quote the other day and it really hit home to me that stress is often if not ALWAYS linked to the expectations that we have of ourselves or others. It doesn't matter what the situation, when we are feeling stressed it is because we are expecting too much from ourselves or others in the moment. It might be that there are external factors that are challenging us, but the expectation we then have of...

When I started The Mother Side I had a vision of creating a global support network and community for Mums. It was a HUGE vision and I didn't know how I was going to do it, but I knew it needed to be done. Because there was and still is not enough support out there for women as they embark on the biggest journey of their lives: the journey from pregnancy to parenthood and beyond. I had learned through my work as a counsellor and antenatal teacher, as well as my...

The Pre-child Me I have always been a worrier, but it was not really a big deal. Annoying yes – those ruminating thoughts could keep me awake at night - but they never really held me back.I would fret over little things (my husband Phil would joke that I would worry if the sky was blue and the grass was green) - things like work deadlines, unfamiliar situations or that I might have offended someone. I’d always been able to mask over it; I’m chatty and sociable so I probably don’t...

My hands crumpled together. Fingers heavy in my palm, twisted together in misery and emptiness.  I stared across the doctor’s office.  My eyes burnt with tears, blurring the figures in front of me.  I searched my mind for an answer, for a feeling, for anything that would stop the wave of uselessness and unease.  I craned my neck and searched in hope for the face of my husband, who stood by me.  His hand lay heavy on my shoulder, grounding me to that moment. Looking into his eyes I let go of my last shred...

Over the years, I have noticed from my work with Mums, both in my capacity as a psychotherapist and an antenatal teacher, that there are some common myths circulating in our society which have a HUGE impact on our mental and emotional wellbeing as mothers. I feel it is really important to explore these myths and the impact that they have. Because we all have subconscious beliefs and processes which affect our thoughts, emotions and actions. By bringing these beliefs and processes into our conscious we become more aware of them...

So this little monkey turns 1 tomorrow! And I am sitting here reminiscing about how she came into the world and feeling emotional! This time, exactly 1 year ago, I was asleep on my sofa - feeling totally wiped out (in a good way) after an AMAZING therapy session with the wonderful Samantha Selby. Samantha used the Rewind technique in our session to help me release any feelings of trauma from my first birth experience. Afterwards I felt so tired I just passed out! When I woke up at about 11:30pm I realised I...

Did you know that more than half of primary school children have been sent inappropriate images or witnessed inappropriate behaviour online but not a single one of them has told, or will tell, their parents? In this blog I will share with you why that is and what we as parents can do about it. I will also tell you of some of the apps we should be very wary of and share some of the resources available to help us parents help our children in this brave new digital age.  HERE’S...