WELCOME TO THE MOTHER SIDE!
So here we are! At the start of what feels like a very exciting journey!
Although I actually feel like I’ve been in ‘labour’ for the last 3 years to get to this point where I feel ready to ‘give birth’ to my new website!
The idea for the Mother Side was born shortly after I gave birth to my daughter, Sia, in 2014. I had done a lot of preparation for my birth, namely The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme, which had been transformational and life changing.
After completing the programme, I went from originally wanting an elective c section due to being absolutely TERRIFIED of giving birth, to having a home birth! AH-mazing! I felt so incredibly empowered and inspired by the change in my mindset that I knew I wanted to do something to help others feel the same!
Then my post-birth euphoria wore off and I came back down to earth with an almighty crash when I realised that I have absolutely NO idea what the hell I am doing now I am on ‘The Mother Side’! Babies don’t pop out clutching an instruction manual and my hubby and I felt totally clueless!
That first night with our newborn baby girl highlighted how clueless we were!!!! After the midwives left and we were all tucked up in our bed (the BEST feeling ever) Sia fell asleep on me and we were suddenly faced with the decision of getting her dressed so we could put her in her moses basket. The midwives had recommended co-sleeping but I was too scared to do that back then in case I rolled on her – she was just SO tiny!
We spent a considerable amount of time debating on how many layers she should wear, whether her moses basket should go under the window (would it be too drafty?) or under the radiator (should we have this on? Would she be too hot?) ARGH! We got ourselves into such a tizz that I ended up asking my hubby, Anthony, to ring 111 and ask them and explain that we are first time parents and have absolutely no idea what we are doing!!!
We look back on that memory and find it comical – but it also highlights to me that we were not prepared for the millions of decisions you are suddenly faced with as a new parent! Who are you supposed to ask stuff like that? Maybe it is common sense but when you’ve been exposed continuously to the media shouting about the dangers of babies being too warm, combined with our own mothers’ obsessions with wrapping everyone up warm – it left us totally confused about the right thing to do!!! I would love to know if the 111 people get other panicky calls from first time parents? I’m sure we can’t be the only ones!!!
So after some guidance from 111 (one bodysuit and one sleepsuit in case anyone is wondering!!!) we made it through that first night – spending most of it checking every few minutes that she was still breathing (neurotic – much!) and then the following days and weeks were all a bit of a blur as we muddled our way through the six week postpartum ‘fog’.
Did you know this was a thing?
Luckily I had been forewarned at an antenatal class by some more experienced Mums about THE FOG so I knew we were in it! I knew that when Ant was offering me ‘breakfast’ at 4pm, because we had no concept of night or day, that it was normal because this was all part of the fog!
But what if we hadn’t been warned?
I have spoken to many first time parents who say they felt TOTALLY unprepared for that period and didn’t know what had hit them. Don’t get me wrong – we still didn’t feel prepared!!!! But at least we knew not to expect to feel back to a version of our normal selves until at least 6 weeks. So we had less expectations of ourselves during that period and thank goodness we did!
Following my empowering birth experience, I went on to train to become a Wise Hippo Birthing Instructor and I have spent the last two years working with couples in my local town of Saffron Walden to help them feel empowered, confident and prepared for their baby’s birth.
I have loved every second of this journey! Especially working with all of my amazing couples! Every time I taught a course I felt sad when we came to the end and I always felt I wanted to offer them than just helping them prepare for birth. Especially when they told me at the end of the course that they felt totally prepared for the birth – but they felt totally unprepared for parenthood!
The more I heard this, the more I realised that there is a huge gap here which needs to be filled! The Mums also told me, after they had given birth, that ‘nothing could have prepared me for motherhood’ – and this felt all wrong to me! I felt there had to be a way to prepare and support women on their transition from pregnancy to parenthood.
I felt there needed to be something in place which offers all Mums:
- The opportunity to feel prepared for their transition to Motherhood and feel supported every step of the way.
- A welcoming non-judgmental community and network of Mums and Mums-to-be – the opportunity to connect with others and find their village!
- A safe non-judgmental place to come and seek support when needed and to know all the different options of support available.
- Reliable, unbiased and ethical information on pregnancy, birth and motherhood – to help them make decisions that feel right for them.
The idea for The Mother Side buzzed around in my head until I became pregnant with baby girl number 2 in October 2016 which forced me to take a break from teaching.
This meant I could put all of my focus into setting up my new venture!
AND here we are!! Finally!
I am SO excited by all the ideas we have for The Mother Side! We are planning to offer all of the above services for Mums and LOTS more! Our website is just a ‘newborn’ at the moment so please bear with us while we work on growing and developing it!
We are busy bees working hard on lots more exciting projects which we will be able to announce very soon!
To be the first to know when we launch some of our new services, join our online community! Membership is free and you will be able to access online resources and submit your blogs and birth stories.
You can also join our Facebook Support Group for all mums and mums-to-be, which is a lovely place to hang out and connect with other mums, find friends in your local area as well as seeking support from all the pregnancy, birth and parenting specialists we have in the group. I am in the group every day so if you have any questions that either myself or someone else can help you with let us know! If we can’t help you, I will find someone who can!
Thank you for reading this far and WATCH THIS SPACE for more awesome stuff coming your way from The Mother Side!
Lots of love